Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Know The Truth About Money: Some Interesting Facts


It can buy a house
But not a home
It can buy a clock
But not time
It can buy you a position
But not respect
It can buy you a bed
But not sleep

It can buy you a book
 But not knowledge
It can buy you medicine
But not health
It can buy a you a heart
But not true love
It can buy you blood
But not life

So you see money isn't everything
And it often causes pain and suffering
I tell you this because I am your friend
And as your friend I want to
Take away your pain and suffering!!
So Send me all your money
And I will suffer for you!
Cash only please! 
After all, what are friends

Stupid Questions With Smart Answers

BoY : May I hold your hand?
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.

GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...

GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??
GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple
GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??

MAN : You remind me of the sea.
WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
MAN : NO, because you make me sick.

WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in! one ear and comes out of the other.
HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.

MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly. What do u think, Peter?
PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.
Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?"
Pupil : "A teacher".
Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
Sam : "It's a family tradition".
Teacher : "What do you mean?"
Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher".
Teacher : "What about your mother?"
Sam : "She's a woman".

Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him,what virtue would I be showing?"
Student : "Brotherly love".
Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say
prayers before eating?"
Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good

Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of
Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time."

Fun With Words

Can you imagine that you can play even with words? Yes, you can. Here are three such ways in which you can do so. Read the instructions and do as directed.
Interchanging of the sound of two words while speaking is called spoonerism. For example, instead of saying ease my tears, you can say tease my ears. This game is named after its inventor William spooner. Here are some famous spoonerisms.
A half-wormed fish
Our showing leopard
Hags flung
Tons of Soil
Blushing crow
Actual Phrase
A half-formed wish
Our loving Shepherd
Flags hung
Sons of toil
Crushing Flow

An anagram is made by reordering the letters of another words or phrases. For example, the words admirer and married have same letters rearranged. Some more examples are:

The combination of two opposite words in a phrase is called oxymoron. When two opposite things are put together, it is called oxymoron. For example, pretty ugly and seriously funny. Some more oxymoron are:
Tragic comedy
Virtual reality
Soft rock
Found missing
Life extinct
Original copy